Been sleeping a LOT this weekend. Could have to do with arriving back in California around 1 am Sat morning and then staying up to watch the Battlestar Galactica 2 hour final episode. I woke up on Saturday, but then went back to bed in the afternoon and slept a lot, and could not bring myself to go to a local bar for a friend’s birthday in the evening.
Today, when I felt the same way, I also tried to at least do some meditation, and reading as well.
I don’t feel emotional so much as this vague feeling of being depressed/oppressed/anxious…but then I have to realize those ARE emotions. And it occurs to me, that having just seen my parents, and my dad being sick right now–his blood counts were too low to have chemo for the second time while I was there–and the fact that my own scans start tomorrow, I probably have a lot churning around inside, and it probably affects me more than I realize. So even though it feels a bit like slacking, I’m trying to honor that, and let myself just sit if that’s what I need to do. I’ve got the bare minimum done for homework for tomorrow, and even less for my Wed and Friday deadlines, but I just have to trust that if I work with this inner stuff, that the energy to do the other stuff will re-emerge in time.