Random Questions About AOC’s Haircut

It’s been a few days since this Washington Times article about Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez spending $300 on her hair came out. Most of the furor has died down, but I find myself still plagued by questions. 

First, what is this “government-subsidized Capitol Hill barbershop” the article speaks of? Are taxpayer dollars subsidizing Jeff Session’s haircuts? Does he also get food stamps? (And who else goes to this barbershop? Did Obama go? What about Trump? I think I’d like paparazzi pics please!) 

Second, to say the cost is $20 for something “government subsidized” is like saying your co-pay is the total cost for your healthcare. How much is the subsidy? Does Sessions tip on the $20, or on what the full amount would be? Enquiring minds want to know!

Is Session’s barber an employee or a small business owner? How much time and money did said barber invest in acquiring the accreditation hours required (2000 it looks like?) to be licensed in Washington, DC?

And how many $20 dollar haircuts will it take to reach a return on that investment? Because education and jumping through hoops isn’t free!   

AOC got lowlights and a cut for her long hair, which takes hours longer and more chemistry knowledge than a ten-minute clipper cut. Chime in, what is a fair hourly rate for a craftsperson? 

By implying that the cut and lowlights are a frivolous expense, is it also being implied that a woman in AOCs position could rock Jeff Sessions hair with no color augmentation and operate just as effectively in our world? (Could she also forego SMILING?)

Or are we just saying that AOC needs to do everything she does now but less obviously, because women have an obligation to perpetuate the myth that we “just wake up like this” and that living up to society’s attractiveness standards is not expensive and time consuming?

Speaking of which, the article says she could have “save $100” by using the Capitol Hill barbershop. From which I can calculate that services at the morally-superior subsidized barbershop would still have cost her $200 — or TEN TIMES the amount that Jeff Sessions has to spend on a haircut. Can we agree there’s a female tax?

(I wonder what it would cost JS if he wanted to cover the gray. I’m NOT suggesting he should try to cover the gray.)

AOC used part of her salary to support the local economy. That wealth is “trickling down,” is it not? Isn’t that the ideal?

Finally — a little about my life. For years, I’ve been doing my own color and getting my hair cut in K-Town, where my stylist, who I love, gradually increased her prices from $25 to $50. Then she got her own chair in Pasadena and raised her price for a cut to $75… I started reeaalllly stretching out the time between haircuts.

When I decided that going blonde was probably beyond my skill set, I found that my stylists base price for color is $180 (exactly the amount of AOC’s lowlights, by the way.)

As an aspiring writer whose hourly wage is compliments, I couldn’t afford to be loyal. In lieu of a government-sponsored option, I decided to go to a hair school.

Going to a hair school is a real experience!

All said and done, they took about 20 hours to do what I think my stylist would have done in four or five. Because I had to arrange an unforeseen second day (to “fix it”) around work, I spent about three weeks with apricot-colored hair. This wasn’t that bad since I wasn’t getting ANY meetings for work (see the silver-lining there) and also,

I’M NOT A CONGRESSWOMAN.

If you’re my congressperson, I don’t want you distracted by a clogged toilet because you were trying to save $15 bucks on a plumber, or waiting in line at the the grocery store during rush hour to save a delivery charge for dinner.

You have my full support to use service-providers who can do the job in a good amount of time, and hopefully do it right the first time, because your time and energy should be spent running the country.  Thank you for your service.

The First Cloned Cat

A couple years back, I conceived of a series which involved a fair amount of research about clones. I still perk up my ears when I see articles about clone advancements. People have been cloning their pet dogs for several years, but now the the first cat has been cloned.

Of particular interest:

For their pet cloning services, Mi says Sinogene hopes to someday transfer the memories of the original animals to their clones using artificial intelligence or man-machine interface technology, according to the Global Times

That Time I Optioned a Book – ADMISSIONS

Here’s a fun little Hollywood-type story. Back in August, I rented the rights to the novel, Admissions, from my friend Eric, in the hopes of getting someone interested in making a limited series, a la Big Little Lies. I was excited because I could see what the show could be, but because the book had a small publisher and little-to-know publicity, it hasn’t sold a ton of copies. And because I am unknown, my attachment wasn’t really a selling point, so I was having trouble gaining any traction. Somehow, though, I was lucky enough to gain the interest of a producing team, who talked it up at their meetings and sent out packets for a few months — but again, because I neither I nor the book or its author are famous, it was hard to gain traction. However, the book was at a couple places when the story broke, which suddenly made it more timely — and finally, we got an invitation to pitch!

Which was awesome.

And a little crazy:

I got the news that pitch meeting was five days away as I was driving to one of my non-writing gigs, telling myself that I hadn’t woken up that morning with a sore throat (I had). At that point I did not have a pitch, had not read the book since June, and needed to double-bag all the food in our house and move out because our building was being tented to fumigate for termites.  So that weekend was… remember when you spent a marathon weekend studying for a really important exam while coughing, blowing your nose and staying at a friend’s house because you and your boyfriend got in a fight?  It was kind of like that! But somehow — with the help of the producers, it came together and we had a pitch by Monday morning. So. Yay!

But all of that is basically a long intro to a topic that been on my mind on and off for the past year or more which is the concept of PARTIALITY.

However, since I’m trying to do this thing where I write posts that are less than 500 words instead 1000-1500, I’ll sign off here, and pick up the subject in another post, coming soon!

Capoeira Lessons

February 15, 2018

On Tuesday I had got up for an early meeting with lots of energy. The meeting –for a non-industry job — was really interesting, and set my mind to spinning –thinking of some interesting things I could write about…

But as the day wore on, my energy dwindled.

I began to feel daunted by everyday practicalities.

And then I got a letter saying that I would not be receiving a publication award I’d been on the shortlist for …

And my short film would not be screened at a festival…

And by evening I was feeling pretty depleted and defeated.

But Paul had just begun a month of Capoeira classes at a studio close to us, and was going to a class that night. On a whim, I said, “Should I go, too?” capoeira

And an hour later I was in a brightly lit studio with new people learning new movements to the rhythm of instruments with unfamiliar names.

And I felt energized and happier again.

Jon Ronson and Jeff Simmermon

You know how on the podcast Scriptnotes, at the end of the main conversation, the hosts each share One Cool Thing? An app, a game, a book that is striking their fancy.

I currently have One Cool Thing X 2 — in other words, two cool things.

One is the book Lost at Sea by Jon Ronson.

The other is this story told by Jeff Simmeron at The Moth, heard by me on the radio on the way back from the gym, which also exists on video:

“sad King Arthur,” “pinballing,” “patina of sheer rage.”  So good.